Tag Archives: author

Everyday I’m Facebookin’

facebook addict 300x300 Everyday Im FacebookinIn the mood for more transparency? Great! Because I have a doozy for you today.

If Facebook were alcohol, I’d have to go to rehab.

I’ve been on Facebook socially since 2008, and early on, it was great. I reconnected with old friends and distant family. I developed some great friendships with other writers. It was all Facebook is supposed to be.

But I loved it too much.

I chatted on Facebook when I should have been writing. I chatted on Facebook when I should have been picking up the house or cooking dinner. When I hadn’t chatted on Facebook in a while, I got anxious.

Even now, if I happen to walk past the computer,  I want to check Facebook.

It bothers my husband. It irritates my kids. It is a daily struggle (still!) to make the right choice. Get something done with my day, or sit on the computer and talk to friends all day long.

When I began to notice that I was getting into arguments on Facebook on a regular basis I knew I had to stop it all.

If I was a drunk on Facebook, I was a “mean drunk.”

That is not who I want to be.

It sounds hilarious. It is incredibly embarrassing, but honestly, I am a Facebook addict. I have  a feeling there are millions of us.

The only way I can function successfully in my work/life balance is to socialize exclusively from my author page. This limits how much I see on Facebook so that I can’t sink in for day-long sessions anymore.

This is why, even if you are a friend from church, or another author who I adore, I won’t accept your friend request or join your group. I just can’t. It’s not healthy for me, my home, or my family.

You may go on Facebook and see I have an account with like, 7 friend. That account administrates my author page and book pages. The 7 friends are my mom, my brother, and 5 other people who snuck in when I wasn’t paying attention.

I may find in the future that even having an author page and book pages is too much for me, but for now, from a business perspective I need to make it work.

You have permission to laugh at me, because it is really dorky, but I appreciate you respecting the boundaries I have to set to keep myself a productive human.

I’d hate to find myself on the curb one day with a sign that says “anything helps” secretly planning to spend the quarters for minutes on a phone with good web connections.

If you’re an  old friend, now you know why I don’t Facebook like I used to. But if you want to be in on the Facebook life I currently lead, feel free to pop over and like my author page and the page for The Tangle Saga.  I promise to keep you apprised there of the whacky things my kids say, and of fun stuff I find while trawling around the internet. And I promise I won’t talk about guns (anymore), other politics, or contentious religious minutia.

Dalek Tangle 300x300 Everyday Im Facebookin

 

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Seven Days of Things I love: Staci Stallings!


My friend, mentor, and author of uplifting, romantic, inspirational fiction. I adore Staci Stallings, and will host her on my blog as many times as she is willing to share with us. So here she is, being honest, open, and uplifting.

**

Being Gentle with Yourself

One of the biggest lessons of my life was when God started showing me how disastrously hard I was being on myself. Even when I started to come out of striving for perfection and I started to try to learn to do life differently, one of the hardest things to learn was to not beat myself up over not relying on God and His love. I know. That sounds bizarre, but it’s the truth.

I would get mad at myself for not remembering to let God do it, for trying to do it myself, for not putting all of it in His hands. It took me awhile to see that God did not require me to beat myself up even over my perceived missteps. I had accepted His forgiveness and love of me, but it did no good if I did not forgive myself and love myself. Accepting that was a hard step because I wanted to do whatever I was doing “right,” and if it wasn’t right, my go-to emotion was “I failed.”


God began to show me that what I perceived as failure was not failure at all to Him. To Him, it was about me learning, not about me being perfect. A friend of mine told me about bending light. She said that if you have a candle in a jar, if you look at it through the glass of the jar, the flame seems to wobble and split. That’s because of the bending of the light through the glass that the flame appears not to be perfect. But if you look not through the glass but from above, the flame appears as it is meant to be—whole and perfect.

That’s the way God sees us—from above. He doesn’t look through the cracked, chipped, and broken glass of our lives the way the world does. He looks only at the whole He created, and He loves that whole and wants only for the whole to come to once again love itself.

And so I had to learn to be gentle with myself. I had to acknowledge that I wouldn’t get it right all the time, that sometimes I didn’t have all the pieces and that in those moments of failure, I had done my best. I had to come to understand that my best sometimes wouldn’t attain what I wanted, but that was okay. It was a learning experience, and God uses each and every one of those for His glory.

When my older brother committed suicide, one of the hardest things was to remember to be gentle with myself, to remember as I found holes in what I could’ve said, should’ve said, could’ve done, should’ve done that I had done my best. If I had known one other thing to do, I would’ve done it. But I didn’t know what else to do, and so in this most difficult time, I had to forgive myself and be gentle with me.

I had to be gentle with me and not try to be the rock, to accept the help of others, to admit my limitations—like the simple fact I needed sleep and food. I had to be gentle with myself when heartache came out as anger, and to the best of my ability to be gentle with those around me. My sister said at one point she got so angry, and then she said, “Then I realized, if this had been me, he would’ve been mad too.” She found gentleness with her honest feelings. That is one of the lessons I’m most grateful for, and the one I am most constantly learning and relearning.

Copyright Staci Stallings 2007

Staci new haedshot 300x231 Seven Days of Things I love: Staci Stallings!Staci Stallings, the author of this article, is a #1 Best Selling author and the co-founder CrossReads.com a new website that gives Christian readers and authors a place to meet and fellowship. With a newsletter, a blog, a forum, and other exciting, inspiring areas to visit, CrossReads visitors can find fabulous Christian books they never knew existed.

Come over on Feb. 12-14, and enter to win one of 169 virtual baskets of ebooks, gift cards, and other prizes!

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Portlandia: Blast from the Past (Post 4 of 4)



960b83c436e34f5ea4a1e5c7e6d5191e 300x201 Portlandia: Blast from the Past (Post 4 of 4)I’m from Southeast Portland, a place known for having more strip joints than Starbuckses (and there IS a Starbucks on every street corner.) It’s also known for gypsy car lots, the Johnson Creek Rehabilitation project which cleared out a half dozen or so 100 year old willow trees, since they weren’t native, and the mob of slightly dangerous homeless people who live at the bottom of Mt. Scott.

Of course, that’s all in the lowlands, or Felony Flats. I’m from Mt. Scott, known for the Boy Scout Camp, the Campfire camp, the sweeping views of downtown Portland, the llama farms, the adorable covered bridge, The Lila Leach Botanical Gardens, the National Cemetery, and a passel of ten year old McMansions that look like they are going to slide off of the hill right into the gypsy car lots at any second. d17c3560 d750 43ce 8382 d4519d64414c 300x225 Portlandia: Blast from the Past (Post 4 of 4)

All of which is to say, Southeast Portland is pretty self sustaining. I never had much call to visit Northeast Portland, which is why, even though the entrance ramp onto the highway that I took last week, wasn’t the very same entrance ramp I remember from 15 years ago, it still brought back a very specific memory that I hadn’t thought about for years.

While in college I had a pretty strong Evangelical zeal. So when the homeless teens stopped my mom and I at IHOP and asked for change to make a phone call, I gave them some cash, a tract, and my phone number, with a note that said they could call me any time, if they needed something.

A couple of weeks later, the girl called. She had a job interview and had no way to get to it. I was ecstatic. This was the kind of thing I lived for. I met her somewhere…maybe IHOP again, I can’t remember, and drove her to her interview. It was at a little low-lying mid-century concrete building tucked discretely behind a highway entrance. Not the same one I used, but similar enough.

While we drove there, the girl told me she was interviewing to be a phone psychic.

Uh.

I had been prompted by evangelical zeal, but I found myself taking a young girl to a place where she would be consorting with the devil! (This was also during the years when I was strongly opposed to Harry Potter and all things remotely wicca. I have since learned to discern better between fantasy, allegory, false religion, and, as the phone psychic represents, a proper scam.)

I didn’t dare drive the girl away from her job interview, because I didn’t have an alternative source of income to offer her in its place.

In the office, we sat on old, cream colored, nubby upholstered chairs and talked about reading the cards, smudging, listening to callers and offering them hope. He offered me a job, which I turned down for religious reasons. He said that my religion didn’t bother him, since he could tell I was in touch spiritually. That stung.

I tried to use the conversation to talk about Jesus with the young woman (who was my age) and the man who ran the phone psychic business, but it was no use, because he had no problem with Jesus. A good prayer to Jesus was a fine addition to the smudging and card reading.


We left. I took the girl wherever it was she asked to be dropped off, I don’t remember where. I also don’t remember if she took the job, though I do remember her body language was defensive, so I don’t think she did. She had learned to discern a scam a little earlier than I had, I think, and probably saw one where all I saw was the stronghold of The Enemy.

I never heard from her again. Probably because I put my phone number on the back of the four spiritual laws, and she didn’t keep that little booklet around forever.

I wish I still had the evangelical zeal I had back then, but having kids changed me. I don’t consider my kids my missions field per se, but they are my treasure to protect. I don’t just open the door to hitchhikers now that my life isn’t the only one at stake.

But that’s it, that’s the memory that came flooding back when I drove around the less familiar Northeast side of Portland. It strikes me as a very Portland type of memory. I could see “Carrie and Fred” finding themselves in a similar predicament, only without the tracts and probably with the Mayor.

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Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)



I didn’t take pictures while I drove myself down the busiest street in town. I felt like a gawking tourist, and wished I could, but I didn’t because of the crashing and dying.

I felt like a sight see-er in a new town because Portland (er, the first pic I found might technically still be in Milkwaukie) has done some cool construction.

This is a new viaduct they have constructed.

Viaduct Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)

Gorgeous, isn’t it? I have been gone too long. Click the picture to learn about the viaduct, what it replaced, and to see more pictures. Apparently it was quite a thing–thorougly discussed and complained about. And yet, I didn’t expect it at all, ant thought it was magnificent. I felt like I was driving through Gotham.

But then my jaw really dropped. I slid off of this super modern, comic like road, onto a little, narrow, familiar street, called Martin Luther King Boulevard, where some of Portland’s charming old architecthure could be seen. I wish I had a picture of this from the perspective I had of it, driving under it, looking up at the windows through the branches of the trees, nonetheless, this picture from a property management site is better than a multiple car accident. old building 300x225 Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)

Portland has a few old wrought iron buildings left, though I hear that if city improvers hand’ had their way, we’d have a downtown to rival New Orleans. You can learn a little more about the architechtural history of Portland on this fabulous blog: http://vintageportland.wordpress.com/



I also passed this, which shut my mouth. I stared at it, with confusion, which appears to be most of Portland’s reaction. It helped me to learn it might not be finished yet. Then again, from what I could see online, it is only going to get worse. One wonders, one does, how this art installation was funded in a time when Portland families are really hurting and struggling financially. I can’t help but thinking the money would have been better spent putting up a food cart and giving food away free to hungry street people. It would have fit the vision of how Portland sees itself, far better than this, um, sculpture does. Of course, the sculpture reflects how Portland functions as a city better than any new outreach to the hurting and hungry would.

hawthorne bridge art Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)

The headline for the article where I found the picture says: “Southeast Portland bridge sculptures are designed to evoke central eastside industrial district’s past.”

Wouldn’t a nice, unadulterated bridge to a better job of representing the industrial past? These men think so:

Bridge Builders 300x187 Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)

MLK is also the home to this great mural.

MLK mural Portlandia: Things I Saw Driving through Town (Post 3 of 4)

I didn’t realize we were in danger of losing it until I googled around for pictures of it. Go ahead and click the pic to learn more about the mural, and MLK BLD in general.

When I see the expensive nonsense going on with the bridges, I fear for the future of the old murals, which add so much charm, history, and community feeling to the town.

What is your favorite site in the older parts of your town?

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Portlandia: The Musical Intermission


intermission 300x233 Portlandia: The Musical Intermission
Enjoy this musical break while I put together the third Portlandia post.

Where I am from:

(Portland, the spiritual home of hipsters and re-enacters alike.)

Where I live now:

“You don’t have to talk to your neighbors in Vancouver.” True Dat. I know at least one person in the original Dream of the 90′s video, but I’ve lived in Vancouver for 11 years now, and the “Vancouveria” video was filmed at MY Walmart, but I don’t even know anyone who happened to be in the parking lot by coincidence when the Vancouver version was filmed.


Who I am married to:

Okay, that isn’t really Daniel, but it is his same mandolin. And a song he plays a lot. I’m just not sneaky enough to get new video of him playing.

Who I am raising:

Watch out world!

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So Many Weird Cults, so Little Time


Patricin Ladys Home Journal ad 1 So Many Weird Cults, so Little TimeAre you eating with an Oneida fork right now?

Did you know the Oneida company was founded by a charismatic cult leader whose cult members assassinated two presidents? No? I didn’t either!

I spent the day with my grandma yesterday, helping the family clean out her attic. She discovered HER grandmother’s silver tucked away. We scanned it carefully to find out what kind of silver it was, who made it and all that.

Like so many other families, our family silver is Oneida. It said “Community Plate” on it. I was pretty sure I knew what plate meant (I wasn’t born yesterday, after all.) But I had to run straight to the computer and google Oneida Community when I got home.

And boy! What a history lesson that was.


I’ll give the highlights and then send you off to wikipedia, because I assume that you, like me, can’t get enough of these frekish tid bits of history that get forgotten.

Well, first off, the people of the Oneida Community were called “Perfectionists.” They believed that Christ had already returned (in AD 70 no less!) and that they needed to be humanly perfect on Earth.

To achieve this they practiced the spiritual exercise of being really critical with each other, and the practical exercise of Eugenics. This meant the the church decided who had the right genetics to breed with each other. Not surprisingly, the leader of the church fathered a whole heckuva lot of Oneida Community children.

The children were then shuttled off to a far wing of their almost 100,000 square foot mansion (still in existence today, and still inhabited by descendents of the Oneida Community.) In their nursery wing they were raised by nurses and nanny’s not too unlike other Victorian children. Expect that in the “community” the children belonged to everyone, and they felt that if you were bonding with your kids too much, they would ban you from the nursery. Somehow, it doesn’t surprise me that a group like that managed to make a couple of presidential assassins feel at home.

Now, the Community was a classic commune with possessions held in common. But apparently they also wanted to invest their money is a going business, so they made silverware. At first it wasn’t any good, but they worked hard and ended up being a great name in cutlery (I almost wrote cult-ery, which they seemed to have a knack for as well.)

They were also liberal and progressive and allowed a woman on their board of directors when women, in general were still considered decorative.

But you know, that one good thing, and a bunch of pretty silverware, don’t counter balance the false-teaching cult bits, in my opinion.

Don’t take my tongue in cheek tone too much to heart: this group practiced a lifestyle that put children in danger and eventually their leader fled the country less he go to jail. Think Warren Jeffs, and you will have a pretty good idea of what I mean.

Here is the wiki-link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oneida_Community you can read up on the details and make up your own opinion on them. And then feel free to share it with me! I’d love to know what you think of the great silverware cult of the Victorian Era.

Oh, and Patrician is the pattern of my grandma’s silver. It was introduced in 1914. That may well be around the time that her grandmother bought it, and it was long after the group disbanded and some of it’s members reorganized as regular old married people running a successful silverware company.

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Kindle Freebies and Best Sellers

Wow!

That’s the only word that comes to mind right now.

Buyer’s Remorse has been on the first page of the Amazon Kindle’s Best Sellers list (free) for two days now. I’ve hovered between 17 and 18 all day, and I just can’t believe it.

Yesterday it was even in the top ten! I had a terrible time getting a screen cap of it where I could see the “Amazon Best Seller List Kindle Store” and my book in the same shot, but the rank in the Mystery/Thriller category was even better, so I’ll share that one.

Fullscreen capture 9102012 121202 PM Kindle Freebies and Best Sellers

I am terribly grateful to all of my friends who helped make this happen.

Check the list now to see where it is ranked and to grab your own copy! http://www.amazon.com/gp/bestsellers/digital-text/154606011/ref=amb_link_84185091_3?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-1&pf_rd_r=11B6TJ718RAEG9S6PFNJ&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=1395862502&pf_rd_i=1286228011

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Transylvania Dutch

Last summer I thought my idea for a book about Amish Vampires was pure genius. After some thought Robert Kroese agreed. (Yeah, I’m name dropping, but when a popular author who writes cool books calls your idea genius it’s hard to keep it quiet.)

A few other authors kinda yawned in a “been there, done that” way since the Amish-Vampire concept is an old joke around the ACFW circles. Plus, it’s already “been done.”

Yes, there is an Amish Vampire book out there. But it’s not my Amish Vampires. My Amish Vampire book is a murder mystery with a flapper detective and the ghost of Mark Twain.

But alas, I wrote 13 pages of the Amish Vampire flapper detective ghost of Mark Twain book and got intimidated. My concept was quirky humor with more than a dash of serious spiritual implications and I wasn’t sure I was a strong enough writer to pull it off.

I’m not deleting those files yet, because it will be a fantastic story, someday.

In the mean time, enjoy the intro scene!

***

A tall, thin, gypsy with a droopy black mustache and inky black eyes picked at his mandolin on the stage. He watched me as he played.

The room pulsed with the sound of the band’s slow jazz and with bodies moving together on the dance floor. Waiters in white tie tuxedos and tails carried steel coffee pots of gin around the room, topping off the drinks we carried in coffee mugs. I let the passing penguin refill my own drink with his hooch. I toyed with the mug, watching the liquid swish side to side as I swayed to the song.

A florid faced man in a grey suit stood next to me. He had wandering hands so I inched my way closer to the gypsy and his band. The man with the hands didn’t have sufficient interest in my person to follow. That, or he saw my fiance and his glowering looks approaching. I saw my Reggie, and turned away.

Tonight we were at Reggie’s favorite club, The Wicked Tap, known for its gypsy band and for never getting raided. I had discovered, over the last few months, that Reggie at his club was a very different man from Reggie in the parlor of the Wix family of Washington Square. I think the strength of the drink that passed around under the innocent lid of the coffee pot was behind the change.

Whatever the cause, I had begun to find our wedding date to be uncomfortably close. My mother and I had discussed the problem at length, but in the end, my step-father liked Reggie and reminded me that I had liked Reggie enough to say yes to his proposal just last month.

I tapped my toe on the parquet floor and watched the black leather of my t-strap go up and down on the wood.

Reggie finally made it to my side with his own mug of whiskey. He kissed me right above the ear. “Dance?” He led me with his arm on my back out to the dance floor. With our cups in our hands we attempted to dance and talk.

“There’s a bet going on.” Reggie leaned in close but his voice was loud.

I didn’t want to hear about the bet. One issue had all of New York in a state of panic. As a city we were transfixed by the killings at the Sing-Sing prison.

Reggie pulled me a little closer, my chest bumping his. I turned my head and held my mug away from him so it wouldn’t spill. “Do you want to know the odds?” His words slurred together.

I did not want to know the odds. Reggie curled his lip up in an imitation of a smile, “Odds are on the Slayer to wipe out murders row.” Reggie leaned close, his breath like a poisonous gas of hooch and cigarettes. “But I disagree. I put my money on political prisoners.”

I pulled away from Reggie, but he grabbed my wrist and yanked me back. My shoes skidded on the waxed dance floor. “Think I’ll make my money back?”

I refused to answer, and twisted my wrist in his grip.

“Cat got your tongue?” He laughed like a pig, snorting. He pulled me across the dance floor and into a small dark room in the back of the club. Acrid blue smoke filled the room like fog. Five men leaned over a bar in the back corner and argued.

“Listen to them, sweet Sadie.” Reggie carried me to the group of men. He held me next to him, still gripping my wrist. I turned my wrist in his hand and pushed against his thumb to break his grasp.
“How much will I make tomorrow if the Sing-Sing Slayer kills a red?” Reggie shouted to the man behind the counter.

The bookie coughed into his fist, “Come on Reggie,” he said with a frown and a nod in my direction. He tipped his green visor up and gave me a weak smile.

“Tell Miss Sadie here what I win if a commie dies.” Reggie was shouting despite the closeness of the room. He jerked my arm up over my head so that I slammed into his side. I looked away from the bookie. I didn’t want his sympathy.

“Get her outa here.” An older man at the bar said. “This ain’t no place for broads.” He gave me a sad smile and took a long pull on his cigarette.

Reggie dropped my wrist and gripped me by the side with his big hands. He held me against him. I leaned close and whispered, “Come on baby, let’s go.” I needed to get him a coffee and put him to bed.

“Tell her, tell her how rich I’ll be if the commie dies. Then I’ll get her pretty face outa here.” He gripped me hard.

I tried to get a deep breath but between his steel fingers and the smoke I couldn’t do it. I did not want to hear the numbers.

“Ten grand.” The bookie looked down at his paper. “Happy now?” He turned his back on me and Reggie.

Reggie pushed me away at arms length and laughed, “We’ll be rich, baby! If a commie bites it, we’ll be rich!”

I reached for the edge of the bar, but my fingers grip the varnished wood. The cup, in my other hand, seemed to rise and fall. I felt the cold whisky hit my chest and then—nothing.

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The KDP Files

Kdp Files imagine 300x180 The KDP Files

Here’s a fun one, that holds true after low these many months. The title of this thread was “DOH! I’m not doing that again!’ : Your personal Top Five DON’T do’s…??

I’m game:

1. Don’t let non-writer friends read it before it is done. Only other writers know how to read and comment on a WIP.

2. Don’t rely on self-editing!!! I still burn red with shame when I think of the condition my book was in when I first hit publish.

3. Don’t send it to a traditional publisher! Why waste time waiting that could be spent selling on Kindle? (Do what you need to do. This is what I need to do!)

4. Don’t stop doing the laundry to make more writing time. Eventually you will get writers block which I find easier to handle if I am not naked.

5. Don’t go it alone. Us crazies need to stick together.

Traci

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